“If I'm going to have a past, I prefer it to be multiple choice.” – The Joker It's taken me a long, long journey into healing and a brave, unexpected confession from someone dear to me to realize that it is time to tell this particular chapter in my story. Because it is not just …
Continue reading My Story: The Vanishing Act – A Tale of an Exvangelical’s Monster
I feel compelled to make clear that what follows is a personal story about Religious Trauma Syndrome in action. It crescendos with a 15-year old me in a fetal position, rocking back and forth under a tree as I sob for God's mercy. It is an epic night for a anxiety attack: The winds howl …
It has never been easy for me to define family. I find this to be a common struggle among exvangelicals, not least of all because those in the evangelical community with whom we share DNA often simply cannot understand the reasons that we have decided to walk away from this path. For so many in …
Continue reading My Story: “Keep My Sister Safe” – A Tale of an Exvangelical’s Prayer
"Signs of the Times" is a popular Evangelical phrase derived from a speech Jesus gives in Matthew 24 in which he foretells of "wars and rumors of war" as the way to know that the Kingdom of God is at hand. The chapter -- along with strange apocalyptic imagery in the Old Testament books of …
Continue reading Exvangelical Meditation: “The Signs of the Times”
You may be surprised to learn that many of my greatest exvangelical heroes are Christians. In fact, it was an evangelical whose writings walked me through the process by which the Moral Majority came into power – how Nixon dabbled in creating a voting base out of the religious right, and how Reagan ran with …
Some of my favorite people are evangelicals. Unless they are using their authority and influence to actively take advantage of others, I'm really not angry at the folks in the pews at all. I've learned that the primary difference between evangelicals and exvangelicals is that the latter have simply realized that we are all victims. …
Continue reading My Story: The Tiger-Eyed Kid – An Exvangelical’s Tale of Amazing Grace
Growing up in the Southern Baptist Church was basically life in a bubble in which we pretended the world we created for ourselves was the only one truly worth living in for everyone. Sometimes, people would just leave and we'd hear they were “backsliding,” but it's okay – we were prepped in Sunday school and …
Continue reading Exvangelical Musings: How to Talk to an Evangelical When You are Deconstructing
I was indoctrinated from a young age into believing that I had a "God-shaped hole" in my heart that only a personal relationship with Jesus could fill. In its way, teaching the exclusivity of this theological belief (as if it is a one-size-fits-all salvation package) is very deceptive, because when a "relationship with Christ" didn't …
Here is today's brief reminder that Hell Theology is child abuse, and I am doing what I can to be a part of the change that will make it reportable to children's services. To those of you who have experienced the psychological trauma of Hell Theology: There is help and resources, and the anxiety you …
Continue reading Exvangelical Meditation: Hell Theology is Child Abuse
After walking away from a childhood faith that taught me that it holds the absolute Truth (about God, life, the universe, your eternal soul, and everything else), transitioning out took more than simply walking away from it all. It required a complete deconstruction of the way that I was taught to think – all things …
Surviving the Spirit 